humor to get you spanked

 Apparently, women and men have a different sense  of humor.

Try sending some of these to your wife and you will understand

Show her this picture and tell her it is the funniest you have ever seen

or, you might suggest returning to some old time values

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our forthcoming anniversary. She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 225 in about 2 seconds." I bought her bathroom scales. And then the fight started......

My wife and I were watching "Who Wants to Be A Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and said : 'Do you want to have sex?'
'No,' she answered. I then said : 'Is that your final answer?
'She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying : 'Yes.. So, I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend." And that's when the fight started...

My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment." I replied, "Your eyesight's perfect." That's how the fight started...

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the rump steak, rare, please. "He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"" Nah, she can order for herself. "And that's when the fight started.....

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?"" Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since. ""My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" And then the fight started...

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, "What's on TV?" I said, "Dust." And then the fight started...

and, one that the woman started

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, "Unbutton your shirt". So, I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me", and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, "You should have dropped your pants. You might have got disability too. "And then the fight started...

expect to be spanked


bottoms up



For Now: Another strong spanking- every second Day

Maybe it is age, maybe it is the season, maybe it is my wanderlust, maybe it is missing adventure, maybe missing hugging family (children, spouses, and grandchildren) or it is the futility of  living in Canada with so many idiotic politicians, or some combination of them all. Having the same boring walk almost everyday is not conducive to mental health. 

Cindy is following through with spanking, as a way of helping keep my mental health above water.

Today had some twists. I was told to go stand in the corner in our bedroom, and she will come to spank me when she is ready. 

About ten minutes later, she entered the room, and puttered around for a bit.

When Cindy was ready, I was told to get the short tawse, and Ms. Hurley.

Pillows propping Cindy upright at the head board, and bare bottomed over the other side of her legs. Something new!

Cindy really spanked, and everywhere n my bottom, with the tip delving between the cheeks often. I remember firmly shutting my legs, after the tip once ventured further between my legs. Rather a unique experience being on the other side of her lap.IT was a first! 

Have you ever been OTK, but on the non-usual side? 

When Cindy tired, a stop, only to re-continue! Like the gif to the side, the top of the back of the legs received significant attention.

Then, it was time for Ms. Hurley, the wonderful present from Danielle, who purchased it in Ireland. I have since measured it against our wooden bath brush, and it is longer, and a wider surface area to spank with. It certainly had me squirming.

Who knows if I will need this often, as the isolation is truly depressing. 

We zoom chat with family and other people, but it is not the same!

I also miss seeing the ocean, walking the beach, and swimming.   

bottoms up


even women's'  eyes wander and wonder



Informed you will be spanked today

legs A positive move forward, and hoping it will last, is that Cindy informed me shortly after breakfast that I would be spanked later.

This happened the second day after the previous spanking.

We have never done this before, where Cindy announces, and then we proceed with our day. the thought does stay with you throughout the day.

Around 4:30, Cindy beckoned me to come upstairs now! These are her words to indicate i am about to be spanked, and where.

I have been indicating to Cindy that she should be spanking harder, and she seems to have also thought this is a good idea.

Pillows propped a the headboard, so that Cindy could sit upright on the bed, and my bare bottom over her thighs.

The short TAWSE was used.


Many strokes, all over my bottom, the top of the back  of my legs, and more, Cindy used her left hand to push(pull) my bottom cheek up, so as to TRULY be able to apply the tawse to the place where leg meets bottom.  The stretched skin truly felt every spank. Then it was time to turn the other cheek, so to speak.

Spanks alternated cheeks, then stayed on one cheek for a while then the other. The far cheek received the most and the hardest spanks, but the tawse wrapped terribly. I was squirming as it wrapped and wrapped, and Cindy finally said:

" Are you trying to get AWAY? 

No Dear!

From then on, I just stayed put. I must admit that a wetness in the eyes might have been a tear in one. If the spanking had continued, their might have been REAL tears.

When Cindy stopped, I was permitted to stand, and I thanked her for the spanking. Cindy admired her work, but the far side was much redder, and really hot to touch. The crack between the cheeks was  also fire engine red.

In discussion later, I suggested that at some point, she should tell me to stand up, walk around the bed, and back over her thighs but from the other side, for the near cheek to become the far cheek. Cindy's reply was that she is right handed, so may have to try her left hand. I also mentioned that I simply move much more of my body past her thighs, so that my bottom is in easy range of her right hand.

One has seen pictures/videos, where the man is on the single bed, and the woman simply walks tot he other side of the bed and thus both cheeks get equally spanked and wrapped! 

Who knows! There may be tears from a spanking sometime in the future. This probably would be a good thing for me, if Cindy can accept bringing me to tears.

How have you solved the over the knee problem of spanking both cheeks sufficiently?

PS: Sex a while later was amazing!

bottoms up







This will be the FIRST wonderful day since we heard about Covid 19

We have a bottle of champagne to celebrate with

and as Cindy does not drink very much


Here is a song to help celebrate

Hopefully you will find one of these funny, amusing, entertaining, or extremely relevant


another version of the same

Hopefully Trump in the next year

  I would just love the following to happen!

and now some smiles

bottoms up

i think we should all celebrate the day by giving or being spanked, and then making love